- What did the couch say to the toilet? Be grateful, I have him sprawled out all over me for hours at a time, you just have him briefly on you once or twice most days.
- What caused the last traffic jam in town? The UFO landed smack down in the middle of the intersection.
- What really powers the Internet? There are little girls and boys that rub two sticks together to keep it powered.
- What is really between Trump’s ears? A lot of hot air.
- What is in the heart of Africa? Frozen margaritas.
- What was the last meal eaten in the Garden of Eden? Tacos.
- Who built the pyramids in the Yucatan? Aliens.
- What is the highest form of flattery? Saying to someone, You’re the stupidest person on earth.
- Speakeasies were not secret bars, what were they? Where one was sent to when they needed a time out from…
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